Tuesday, June 05, 2007

#50: Dawn's Big Date

Whew! Never in my life (and by life I mean 'since I started this blog') have I been so drenched in BSC fashion. The majority of it is pretty Dawn-centric, and this is supposed to be what Claudia wore, but I think Dawn's ventures away from "California Casual" will bring - quote-unquote - the lols. So sit back. Unearth a Twinkie from the secret stash under your bed. Enjoy the identity crisis of a fictional thirteen year old girl.

"Claudia wears super-trendy clothes, and she puts them together in ways that are uniquely Claudia. Today, for example, she was wearing maroon leggings and ballet slippers under an oversized yellow shirt. Around her waist she wore this great belt that she made herself from three thin strips of leather tied together and decorated with ceramic beads. For the final touch, Claudia had swept her hair over to one side and tied it up with another thin leather strip that had the same kind of beads on it. She looked great - and she was just hanging around her own house!"


"In the next few minutes, Stacey and Claudia arrived. Naturally, they both looked gorgeous. Claudia had tied her hair up in a high ponytail with this silver netting around it. She was wearing wide black pants and a top with a silver moon appliqued on the front.

Stacey wore a form-fitting purple dress and pink tights with black stripes. [Seriously, Stacey?] 'Wow! You guys really got decked out!' I said as they walked in. (I was dressed for comfort, in black leggings and a big blue top lined with fleece.)

'You have to get dressed up on New Year's Eve,' said Claudia. 'That's part of the fun.'

I shrugged. I guess everyone has their own idea of fun."

Yeah. For some of us, fun includes lecturing the readers on the virtues of healthy living every time we happen to be narrating. You're such a killjoy, Dawn.

"'Have you gone nuts?' Mary Anne gasped, when she saw what I was doing to my wardrobe. A bunch of clothes were laid out on my bed. I was completely revamping everything with the help of Mom's sewing kit and a pair of sharp scissors.

All my jeans needed to be taken in. (I ripped one more pair above the knee and left one pair unripped.) I made several off-the-shoulder tops. I even created a miniskirt out of a pair of gray sweat pants. I cut off the legs, opened the inside seams, and then patched up the gaps with some flowered material. (It was left over from a flowered t-shirt I'd cut up.)

'That's pretty cute,' said Mary Anne, holding up the sweat skirt. 'You should get Claudia to help you.'

'Nah,' I disagreed. 'Claud has her unique style. I want to create my own style.'"

WARNING: FASHION-RELATED BSC DRAMA AHEAD.

"Claudia's reaction took me by surprise. 'The look is all wrong for you,' she said. 'It's not who you are.' Can you imagine Claud - of all people - saying that? I just shrugged. (Cool kids shrug a lot.) But inside I was steaming. I guess Claudia thought it was okay for her and Stacey to be stylish and cute, but not me. No. I was just plain, wholesome Dawn, and I was supposed to stay that way.

I decided she might even be jealous. She might not want anyone looking more 'unique' than she herself did.

So, by the time of our Wednesday afternoon BSC meeting, I was pretty angry at Claudia. I slumped on her bed, chewing hard on a wad of pink bubble gum. (It was sugarless.)

'I've never seen you chew gum before,' Stacey observed.

'There's a first time for everything,' I replied."


Let's review what we've learned so far. 1. If it isn't oversized, it isn't fashion. 2. sweat skirts = height of fashion. 3. Cool kids shrug a lot. 4. Claudia can drive a person to gum-chewing with a few fashion critiques. GUM CHEWING, people.

"On Thursday afternoon I took all my baby-sitting money and went to Zingy's. It's this great store that sells very trendy clothes. I didn't even take Mary Anne with me. I wanted to go by myself.

The salesperson at Zingy's had short maroon hair and four holes pierced in each ear. [5. the more holes in your ear, the cooler you are.] At first I was very intimidated by her hair, but she turned out to be very nice. She helped me put together a great outfit, which was what I was wearing as we waited for Lewis.

Here's the outfit: black ballet slippers; black lace capri leggings; a short metallic silver skirt with all this crinoliny stuff underneath that made it poof out; a stretchy, tight, black-and-white-striped top with long sleeves. I'd bought six rubber bangle bracelets, and a new pair of feather earrings that reached down to my shoulder. (I wore both earrings in the two holes in my right ear. I put a pair of small black hoops in the two holes on the left.) This time I didn't set my hair; I piled it on top of my head, then made six braids."

. . . oh, okay. This outfit is beyond mockery.
and, finally, the pinnacle of New Dawn glory:

"Everyone looked at me. I'd spent Sunday tie-dying a pair of white tights and some of Richard's old t-shirts. Today I was wearing the dyed tights, my new sweat skirt, and one of the t-shirts belted over a leotard.

I'd spent the rest of the afternoon putting my hair in tiny braids all over my head. The I gelled the braids. This morning I'd unbraided my hair up to about chin-length. I left in the braids along my head. It looked cool. The top was in braids and the bottom was all crinkled and frizzy."

Of course, I think we all know that Dawn learns a valuable lesson about Being Herself and returns to her own style. But just think of it: wouldn't it be fantastic if the rest of the series featured Bad-Ass Totally 80s Dawn and her ever-expanding sweat skirt wardrobe? I hope you have enjoyed the first (and most likely last) installment of What Dawn Wore, which could be subtitled Or: What Was Dawn Smoking?

0 comments: